Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Scary news

I found out last night that I am going to be an aunt and I am terrified. I have wanted to be aunt forever but when you are an oldest child married to another oldest child you know you will likely have to wait a while. I am scared about how I will deal with this baby, I am scared that something bad will happen to this baby and I am scared of what could happen if another baby in our family doesn't make it.

I held a baby for the first time after Reid this past weekend. Baby S is already nine months old and is far from a newborn, but it was still hard. DH said it was hard to watch me hold her. Maybe by the time my niece or nephew arrives in November, I'll be able to hold a new baby.

1 comment:

Lareina said...

It's hard to think of the future and not be scared anymore... very hard... but all we can do is keep moving and try not to let our fear overtake us. I'm sure when the time comes and the baby arrives, you'll know if you're ready to hold them. It takes time but eventually it won't hurt so much. Hugz.